Follow these 12 simple tips and your children will grow up to be better behaved and better equipped to cope with life’s challenges. In the process you will save yourself a great amount of stress and both you and your children will enjoy life more because of it.

• Your child will take everything you say at face value implicitly. A child will understand more than you think they will, and if you say something not really meaning it, they will believe you. If you run them down, you will probably program them to believe it.

• Children love challenges. Tell them not to do something, and it becomes a great challenge to do it and escape punishment, or just escape notice. Don’t make threats, try to handle it differently.

• Don’t use bribes. All they will understand is that you have to bribe somebody to get what you want.

• Don’t force promises. Small children can’t keep promises so don’t pressure them into lying to you and then punish them afterwards. It’s better just to try and ask them to do their best.

• Cut them a bit of slack now and then. Give them some space, some freedom, and they are more likely to do something for you when you want it done.

• Keep things simple when you’re talking to your children and don’t confuse them by asking them to do too much at once. Don’t use big words, use simple everyday language.

• Do not give military style orders and expect blind obedience and an immediate response. Rather explain what you want done and try to let the child learn for itself and provide its own solution. Remember to praise the child for its efforts. Afterwards you can say it might have been easier to do it like this, and let your child learn, rather than feel inadequate.

• Don’t give them everything they want, or indulge them too much. They’ll begin to expect it all the time.

• If you’re involved in a game don’t bend the rules. All your child will learn is that rules are made to be broken.

• Don’t impose rules on your child that they are too young to keep.

• Don’t make them feel guilty. They will grow up hesitating to try to do something for themselves or make a decision in case they fail and feel guilty about it.

• Be careful what you order your child to do, and only give that order when it is absolutely necessary to do so. Never order something as a joke, or your child will never take an important order seriously.